Saturday, July 3, 2010

Deeper Thoughts

My mom had the privilege to go back to the town I graduated high school in this week and visit with some friends while my Dad was up in that area at church camp.  She stayed with a very dear family friend of ours whose family is a bit eccentric . . . and who heavily rely on her.  Her oldest grandchild graduated from high school last year.  She has a lot of anger although we're not really sure why.  Everyone has been afraid for years that she'd end up pregnant . . . and sure enough . . .
I asked my mom if she were planning to keep the child.  I know a family who would take the child as our own if she wasn't.  Mom said she was planning to keep it right now, but mostly they're just praying that it is healthy.  The girl isn't sure who the father is, how far along she is, and has been off and on drugs.  She still smokes some marijuana and cigarettes and does who knows what else.
My heart is broken for this baby.  I want one so badly and girls like her get them.
My heart is also broken for the thoughts that ran through my head after mom told me the child might have some problems due to the drug use.  I almost felt like maybe I didn't want it after all, even if it did get offered.  Am I a bad person?  That child will need someone to love it and care for it maybe even more than any other child who hadn't gone through that.
The whole situation just breaks my heart.

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