Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Stability or Something Like It

The job I've been temping at for about three and a half months now is going to hire me full-time. It's not my dream job or anything, but it's a job I know with people I know and a steady paycheck. And after 90 more days, benefits, too.
Somehow, everything seems to be falling into place lately. Jeremy got his raise. Our rent went down. And now I'm getting hired full-time.
I've got to admit, I'm sort of waiting for the floor to fall out from under us after not having things like this happen for so long.
So, prayers of thanksgiving and praise to our God who has helped us through the really hard times and is now blessing us beyond what we were expecting. Isn't that what He always does, whether we recognize it or not?

Friday, June 8, 2012

Dread

With the decision to stay here made and the promise of some "extra" money this fall, not only are we talking about paying down our debt . . . something I've been longing for a while now. We're also talking about going to talk to a fertility specialist. I need to know why I'm not ovulating. I need to know why I can't have a baby. More than just "PCOS." And that makes me excited and dreading at the same time.
I was really hoping we'd never have to go through all the fertility treatment stuff. I was hoping against hope that a miracle would occur and I would just end up pregnant on my own instead of forking out thousands of dollars to go through agonizing months of trying while adding chemicals and hormones and needs and ultrasounds and other things I don't even want to think about. I wanted God to answer that prayer so badly. I still do. There's still time.
But at the same time, I'd like to know the reasons anyway. I want to know why I've had to go through these almost five years of hoping and crying and doubting and bitterness and jealousy and wishing and agonizing and negative pregnancy tests and answering questions about why we haven't "started our family yet." What's wrong with my body that it can't do what all the rest of my friends seem to be able to do with no problems . . . again and again and again?
So, I'm looking forward to finally doing something about this problem. I'm not looking forward to any of the treatments. And I don't even know what they are yet. In case you haven't realized this about me in reading this blog, I'm really good at expecting the worst. So, get ready. It could get interesting on here after summer. I'll keep you posted.

Final Decisions

With the end of school every year comes decisions. Or at least, that's the way it feels it happens in our family. I thought we had decided already to just stay on here another year at least. Evidently, Jeremy was holding out hope to hear back from one more school before reaching a final decision. Can you tell we've been too busy to really sit down and talk lately?
It basically came down to the wire on this one, because we also received the notice that our lease was soon to be up and a decision about that must be made as well. We looked over the list for prices if we renewed at various length leases and discovered that a year lease would actually lessen our rent instead of a raising it. Then, the headmaster of the school here told Jeremy that he had talked with the school board and they had agreed to get him a raise.
Jeremy called the other school just to see if he could get a few more details to make sure it wouldn't be better for us. Sure enough, what they would be paying would be less than what he made this year. So, here we stay. And when he had made this decision, the headmaster actually told him his raise was going to be more than what we had originally thought it would be.
Seems like maybe God's blessing this decision, huh?